Oh man the weather at Sliema is great today! So where to first, The Point or Zara? Probably The Point right. I should ease my way into the sales cos ya know… Zara war zone. And I need those River Island jeans. Leggo!

Jesus that’s a lot of people. Oh dear I already spotted a person who’s gonna give me a fake ass Happy New Year blah blah. Hide behind Cinnabon. Oh dear Cinnabon smells good man. Coast is clear walk no run away from Cinnabon. Oh look popcorn. Daniel stop looking at food you’re here for clothes and fashion.

It’s hot inside and I’m wearing 4 layers of hobo-ness. I can’t dress appropriately for the weather if my life depended on it. Maaa Daniel.

Okay River Island is kinda calm compared to what’s going on outside. Jeans jeans jeans. Where are my jeans? There they are. Sale? Nope. Well fuck but okay they’re nice enough. Should I take a tee to see how they look with a neutral? Yes I should. Striped one is cute.

The changing room is small. This shouldn’t even be called a room. It’s like that really dramatic Chris Brown song. NO AIR.

Okay jeans please cooperate.

Okay jeans won’t cooperate.

Seriously Daniel skinny jeans shopping after the Christmas holidays? Logic. Maybe I should grab a bigger size? CRINGE. Or the slim fit in the same size. Yeah I’m hating the super skinny look anyway. Here goes nothing.

OH WOW my ass looks great in these ones. Oh yeah. Totally getting them. I’m feeling this striped tee too so ya know what… YOLO. Get it too and walk away. And I should check if my friend still wants the plaid shirt he liked while I’m still here. Nope he bought one from ASOS yesterday. Well I asked. I’m such a good friend.

There’s a huge teddy bear giving out Haribo to kids. Gotta have some. He wants a photo with me. LOL. Okay. Now take one with my phone too please. Upload. I need that green tea juice thing from M&S. It’s €1.75 now? I thought it was €1.50. 2015 man…

People are talking about some Zara queue situation on What is going on and why hasn’t anybody linked me on Facebook? Let’s look it up while we walk. Oh dear it’s true. All that for the initial 20-30% off? I dunno.

Okay now it’s kinda warm outside too. And I can’t wrap this jacket around my waist. Great. Almost there. Maybe I should quickly stop by Diesel to see if Marco’s there and wish him a Happy New Year? Duh. He’s here!!! Let’s chat. Holyyyy moly this jacket is amazing. And this checked shirt has RUFFLES? What. Help. Why don’t I come to Diesel more often? I need to come to Diesel more often.

Zara. Am I even ready for this? It looks okay from outside. Let’s walk. Okay no. OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT? The line to pay is from wall to wall. It’s cutting the shop in half. I can’t deal with this. A girl just stepped on my shoes and didn’t even say sorry. Oh no you diqqint gurl. I haven’t even looked at any of the clothes yet I’m too overwhelmed by this.

Let’s go to the menswear section. Should be quieter than downstairs right? Wrong. The queue is nearing the changing rooms. Okay I hate shopping in this environment. That leather jacket is nice. But the markdown is so meh. People really go crazy for this? They wouldn’t buy it for 15-20 more but go mental for it now? I can’t understand. I’ll come back next week when there’s more space. Hopefully. My stomach is growling and the guy next to me heard it roar. That’s a sign I need to leave.

Time for FOOD. At least I got miracle ass jeans.


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